Make up: Alessandra DiSarno / Luna.MuaXO | Photographer: Anton Guzman

“Do What Makes You Happy”

Since I’ve graduated college a few short months ago, but the words of wisdom that accompany the congratulations haven’t stopped coming. I have heard a few of the same lines over and over again.

I am often given some straightforward advice: “Do what makes you happy.”

Woah, okay.

This statement seems pretty simple, but it can also send your head spinning. That simple question has caused me to wonder what makes me happy.

Don’t get me wrong. I absolutely love what I am doing. Being able to write and work for myself has been an absolute blessing. I have the power to create my own schedule and the freedom to work from where I want, and I love that.

Even though I am doing what I love, something has just felt a little bit off.

I have to be honest. The burnout from the last couple semesters is lingering. Working from the time I woke up to the time I went to sleep—whether it was babysitting, writing or school work—was once my norm, but now I just can’t do it. 

Bouncing back has been a bit of a struggle. Nobody warned me of the myriad of post-graduation crises. There is a weird void. I was so relieved when I graduated, but now, I actually miss school.

In order to patch up that weird little void that is no longer filled by school, I have been trying to find things that I enjoy doing with all of this extra time on my hands.

I was planning on spending my time going to the gym every day and writing blog posts for my own sites every week. I was also planning on going to the Dominican Republic for five months. Obviously, some things just don’t work out as planned.

My new pastimes include buying too many plants for my room, looking at condos on Zillow, squeezing in more dates, planning trips and writing more for myself. DIY projects have also been a fun way to pass the time. Need candles, soaps or bath bombs? My kitchen is pretty much a DIY warehouse.

One of the trips I am planning (and actually going on) is to Thailand! This is going to be my first big solo trip, and I am super excited. I am going for an SEO conference, so that should be a blast.

I am also learning unhealthy habits that I need to knock off in order to live my happiest life. I am realizing that I can say “no” without justifying myself and I’m trying to find a better work-life balance. I’ve also been making an effort to spend less time on my phone.

In order to counteract the unhealthy habits, I have implemented healthier ones. An example is my brand new skin care routine. Who would know how satisfying a little rose water and avocado oil could be?

It’s the little things that make me the happiest.

Something that I am really working on is goal setting. This always came so easily to me because the goal was simple: graduate college and don’t get in debt doing so. Now trying to plan going forward is difficult because there are so many more variables.

If you can’t tell by this public journal entry, I am all over the place. But I think that is okay. I am almost 22 and for the first time in a long time, I have taken a step back and decided that I don’t have to grow up right this instant.

I know, I know. I am actually at the point where I should be growing up, but I have been so focused on growing up and getting to the next step since I was, like, 9. I am definitely growing, but I am not forcing myself in any direction.

In addition to the suburban-housewife-esque hobbies I’ve picked up, I have also started making less calculated decisions. I am letting my house savings plateau and I am actually booking the trips that I planned while I was daydreaming. I am making the rash decisions that I never let myself make before.

But guess what? I am doing it. I am doing what makes me happy